Against their better judgment, the good people at Bloomsbury USA have offered to make an Animal Review book.
Why they are doing this is anyone’s guess, but somehow they decided to, so there should be a book available sometime next April. The next several months will be eaten up by the process of actually writing said book, so posts will be less frequent for a bit. Just kinda FYI.
Thanks to everyone for reading Animal Review, and a special thanks to Nick Trautwein, formerly of Bloomsbury, for an epic lapse in judgment.
It was recently reported by the BBC that a man in Australia was forced to wrestle a kangaroo after it broke into his home. The six-foot marsupial crashed through a window in the middle of the night.
“My initial thought when I was half awake was, ‘it’s a lunatic ninja coming through the window’,” Beat Elltin told reporters. Sorting out that it was actually not an insane ninja but rather a more common member of Genus Macropus, Mr. Elltin began wrestling the kangaroo, eventually getting it into a headlock and dragging it out the front door.
While this was going on, Mr. Elltin was dressed in his underwear, which were shredded in the brawl, along with much of the skin on his buttocks.
Interestingly enough, there is an old saying among Australia’s aboriginal peoples (for whom kangaroo meat is a mainstay of their diet) that goes: ‘If you find yourself putting a kangaroo in a headlock while wearing only your underpants, there’s a problem.’
Truer words about underwear-clad kangaroo wrestling have rarely been spoken, except, of course, by Mr. Elltin himself, who a long time ago said, ‘I really don’t think I’ll ever have to put a kangaroo in a headlock. But knowing my luck, if it happens, I’ll probably be dressed in only my underpants which will likely be shredded in the process, so maybe I better keep some Bactrin around.’